You cannot always FIT others into your 'perfect' paradigm
Today, I read an article on how some pedigree dogs have been mutated to be what they are now, leading to a drastic change in facial features and the creation of deadly diseases for these species. (Here is the link: http://www.viralnova.com/dog-breeds-truth/)
You cannot always FIT others into the paradigm of what you think is perfect.
This is also the basis of all relationships. Many start a relationship ignoring the matters that they do not see eye-to-eye, either by brushing the matter aside as they think that it will just disappear, or that they will get the other party to conform to his/her value(s) one day. A relationship, whether friendship, family connections, love relationship etc., is not about getting the other party to conform to your wants and expectations of him/her, but to accept them as they are. It's not about taking. It's about giving.
I have spoken to quite a few who think that they can get the other half to fit into his/her paradigm of beliefs and values. When they are told they should not be so autocratic domineering over other people's preferences, you'll hear the next line: "I WILL make him/her."
Think again. If you were in that person's shoe, would you like to be controlled in this way? If you do not, then what makes you think that they do?
Remember. They are living creatures who grew up with a different set of parents with different backgrounds and experiences. They are not robots that can be programmed with a mere flick of a switch. If you have sibling, you should already know that despite growing up in the same environment does not make you two "CLONES" of each other, how do you expect the other person to conform absolutely to your every whim and fancy? This is a mere demonstration of ignorance and pure foolishness.
So, if you have a problem in any relationship, I believe it is important to address it and discuss it instead of putting it off for later. While the situation may pass, the core issue that had caused YOU to see it as a problem in the first place will always be there. Is it not better to lay your cards clearly on the table to discuss any dissatisfaction and find ways to come to terms with each other should the same issue arise again?
Do not bet your hopes on the fact that one day, you will be able to change him/her to suit your ways. It will never be so. This is LIFE and it is meant to be colourful. No two are ever alike. Enjoy it. You are here to live a unique life experience, and so are they.
Love and light,
Genevieve
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